10 Things To Start Doing Yourself

Your mind and body both need to be exercised hard  to gain strength.  They need to be challenged hard, and they need to be worked consistently, to grow and develop over time.  If you haven’t pushed yourself in lots of little ways over time—if you always avoid doing the hard things—of course you’ll crumble on the inevitable days that are harder than you expected.

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Below are the 10 Hard Things To Start Doing Yourself

Start letting go of unnecessary ideals. – When a thought comes to mind, ask yourself if it’s helping you grow or holding you back.  Take back control.  Make the unconscious, conscious, and let go of what isn’t serving you.  This form of letting go is not giving up.  It’s surrendering any obsessive emotional attachment to particular people, outcomes and situations.  It means showing up every day in your life with the intention to be your best self, and to do the best you know how, without expecting life to go a certain way.  Have goals, have dreams, aspire and take purposeful action, and build great relationships, but detach from what every aspect of your life must absolutely look like to be “good enough” for you.  Just accept reality and then respond effectively.  Focus on what matters—what moves you forward today—and let go of what does not

Start putting your heart and soul into the things you do. – There’s a big difference between empty fatigue and gratifying exhaustion.  Life is short.  Invest daily in meaningful activities.  And don’t wait around!  Too often we wait—because we think we need to “find” something new or different to be passionate about.  But that’s not true.  If you want more passion in your life right now, act accordingly right now!  Put your whole heart and soul into the next thing you do.  Not into tomorrow’s opportunities, but the opportunity right in front of you.  Not into tomorrow’s tasks, but today’s tasks.  Not into tomorrow’s run, but today’s run.  Not into tomorrow’s conversations, but today’s conversations.  I’m absolutely certain you have plenty in your life right now that’s worth your time, energy, and passionate focus.  You have people and circumstances in your life that need you as much as you need them.  You have a massive reservoir of passionate potential within you, just waiting.  Stop waiting!  There is no tomorrow.  Put your heart and soul into what you’ve got right in front of you!  Become it, let it become you, and great things will happen FOR you, TO you, and BECAUSE of you.

Start stretching yourself just beyond the edge of comfort. – When you’re struggling to make progress, that’s when you actually are.  Let that sink in.  It’s far wiser to spend an extremely high quality ten minutes stretching yourself, than it is to spend a mediocre hour running comfortably in place.  You want to be stretched to the edge of your ability at least once a day—it needs to be hard and uncomfortable for a little while.  But most of us don’t want to be uncomfortable, so we run from the possibility of discomfort constantly.  The obvious problem with this is that, by running from discomfort, we are constrained to partake in only the activities and opportunities within our comfort zones.  And since our comfort zones are relativity small, we miss out on most of life’s greatest and healthiest experiences, and we get stuck in a debilitating cycle with our goals.  We keep doing what we’ve always done, and thus we keep getting the results we’ve always gotten.  And our true potential falls by the wayside.  Choose differently!  Go to environments that expand your mind.  Spend time with people who inspire you to stretch yourself.  Read books.  Grow.  Get better.  Your life is your choice.

Start taking more deep breaths, so you can mindfully collect more lessons for the long run. – It’s incredibly easy to overestimate the significance of a single decision, outcome, or event in the heat of the moment.  But you must remind yourself to take a deep breath when things don’t go your way.  Your results in the long run—good or bad—are always the byproduct of many small decisions, outcomes, and events over time.  The truth is we all fail sometimes.  The greater truth is that no single failure ever defines us.  Learn from your mistakes.  Grow wiser.  Press on.  Character and wisdom are sculpted gradually.  They come with loss, lessons, and triumphs.  They come after doubts, second guesses, and unknowns.  The seeds of your success are planted in your past failures.  Your best stories will come from overcoming your greatest challenges.  Your praises will be birthed from your pains.  So keep standing, keep learning, and keep living.

Start side-stepping senseless drama. – Tune out the cheap shots people take at you along the way.  Don’t waste words on people who deserve your silence.  Sometimes the most powerful thing you can say is nothing at all.  Seriously, before you waste it on anger, spite or frustration, think of how precious and irreplaceable your time is today.  Give yourself a permanent break from the drama that can be easily avoided—just don’t engage in it.  Life is just too short to argue and fight.  Count your blessings, value the people who matter, and move on from the drama with your head held high.  Remind yourself that calmness is a human superpower.  The ability to not overreact or take things personally keeps your mind clear, your heart at peace, and yourself moving forward.  Take constructive criticism seriously, but not personally.  Listen to others, and then operate with your own intuition and wisdom as your guide.

Start staying true to your values and convictions. – Rejections don’t matter in the long run.  Accept them and refocus your attention on what DOES matter.  What does matter is how you see yourself.  Always make a habit of staying 100% true to your values and convictions, regardless of what others think.  Never be ashamed of doing what feels right.  To help you implement this positive habit, start by listing out 5-10 things that are important to you when it comes to building your character and living your life.  For example, Honesty, Reliability, Self-respect, Self-discipline, Compassion, and Kindness.  Having a short list like this to reference will give you an opportunity to consciously invoke and uphold your handpicked traits and behaviors in place of doing something random simply for the purpose of external validation.

Start looking for silver linings. – The most powerful weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another.  Train your mind to see the good in the truth.  Studies have shown that doctors who are put in a positive mood before making a diagnosis consistently experience significant boosts to their intellectual abilities than doctors in a neutral state, which allows them to make accurate diagnoses almost 20% faster.  Similar studies of other vocations have shown that optimistic salespeople outsell their pessimistic counterparts by over 50%, and university students primed to feel happy before taking math exams statistically outperform their neutral peers.  So it turns out that our minds are literally hardwired to perform at their best not when they are negative, or even neutral, but when they are positive.  So think a little less about managing your problems and a little more about managing your mindset.  Do your best to keep it positive.

Start focusing inward more often. – Do your best to focus inward, as often as necessary, whenever you need a moment of clarity.  And remember that your time spent focusing inward and finding clarity doesn’t just help you—your mind is powerful and your thoughts create ripples in other people’s lives.  When you bring clarity into your life, you bring the best of yourself into everything you do—you tend to treat yourself and others better, communicate more constructively, do things for the right reasons, and ultimately improve the world you’re living in.  This is why praying, or just meditating on some positive mantras, on a daily basis can actually make a real-world difference in your life.  A heightened level of your conscious awareness—mental clarity—instantly elevates you in countless ways.  And then interesting things begin happening—good things that are outside of your immediate purview—good things you haven’t even thought of yet.

Start embracing your humanness and giving yourself more credit. – “Human” is the only real label we are born with, yet we forget so easily.  To become attached to an opinionated label of depressed, divorced, diseased, rejected, or poor, is to be like the rain, that doesn’t know it is also the clouds… or the ice, that forgets it is water.  For we are far more than the shape we’re currently in.  And we, like the wind, water, and sky, will change forms many times in our lives, while forever remaining beautifully human.  Once we fully embrace our humanness, it’s almost funny to see how quickly we outgrow what we once thought we couldn’t live without… and then we fall in love with what we didn’t even know we wanted.  Take this to heart.  And don’t forget to pause once a day and appreciate how far you’ve come.  You’ve been through a lot, and you’ve grown a lot.  Give yourself credit for the steps you’ve taken, so you can step forward again with grace.

Start taking the next small, insignificant step (one at a time, every day). – Sometimes it’s really hard to get going again.  This is how Angel and I felt a decade ago when we were stuck in a rut after simultaneously losing two loved ones to suicide and illness.  It was really hard to move when we didn’t think we had the strength to push forward.  But we pushed ourselves to take one tiny step every day—one journal entry, one workout, one honest conversation, and so forth—and it felt good, and we got stronger.  And believe it or not, that’s basically what I did again this morning.  I was struggling hard to motivate myself after a significant business opportunity fell through.  I was feeling defeated.  So I took the tiniest possible step.  Just turning on my computer, opening up the word processing application, and writing a single sentence.  Such an action is so small as to seem insignificant, and yet so easy as to be possible when I was feeling defeated.  And it showed me that the next step was possible, and the next. c

Source: marc and angel

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