Blow is the mps chat where we managed to spot MPs tell father Lukodo to focus on bigger things and leave Makerere students alone. We decided to bring it all to you and see where it all started from.
Tumwebaze: Looks like it’s in the bag for Sebalu. Bobi Wine has just been nominated.
Nsereko: Not so fast, @Tumwebaze. There are twists and turns to come. June 26 is such a long way to the elections.
Tumwebaze: Last year, Sebalu only lost by a handful of votes because the party was divided. Now everything is smooth.
Anite: Don’t underestimate his opponents, especially Bobi Wine.
Ecweru: I think Opposition votes will be divided, but the fellow called Bobi Wine could turn the tables due to his celebrity status.
Lubwama: Those guys who threw money in the grave…
Munyagwa: What about them?
Franca: Lubwama must be wishing he was the dead.
Mpuuga: But Lubwama, you are getting car cash balance soon. Why covet the dead’s send-off?
Lubwama: Covet sounds like Trump’s ‘covfefe’.
Ecweru: Like seriously, Ssemwanga himself was always giving to the needy. He must be turning in his grave over the extravagance at his funeral.
Anite: But he lived an extravagant life.
Katuntu: Still, he would have wished to give that money to the needy.
Bahati: Why are honourable members discussing burial of a socialite? How does that help the economy?
Otafiire: When Otafiire closes his eyes to deflect attention from such lullaby discourse, you go around saying Otafiire is sleeping. My parents must have conceived me during the wrong season to end up having to listen to such discourse.
Bahati: I see Otafiire has found a subtitle for his sleeping series episodes.
Ecweru: It’s now a series?
Nsereko: Series? Soon we shall have to budget for anti-sleeping pills. I think the Ethics minister should take note.
Fungaroo: Lokodo is busy arresting nonstarters like a mere VJ. He goes quiet on real issues.
Nsereko: But the integrity of Cabinet is at stake due to sleep. State-of-the-Nation address is next week followed by Budget speech.
Bahati: I don’t want to comment. Guys must be practicing sleep patterns.
Franca: I heard Lokodo is pursuing the MUK student who turned up in a racy lacy outfit during a party. Very lost minister we have.
Lokodo: It is part of my mandate. You guys passed the Anti-Pornography Bill and I am implementing.
Abiriga: By the way, people keep saying MUK, MUK, MUK. But the university is called Makerere University. So what is the ‘K’ for?
Ecweru: I think I should take a siesta to avoid migraines from the angle this chat room is taking.
Anite: Well, many people actually don’t know what the K stands for.
Mpuuga: @Abiriga, you tell us first. What do you think it stands for?
Munyagwa: That fellow is going to say Kaguta.
Abiriga: Actually, you are not entirely wrong. I was pondering between Kaguta and Kikoni.
Anite: That one got me. Kikoni?
Abiriga: Makerere is near Kikoni.
Tumwebaze: Makerere University, Kampala. That is the full name. After University of London, East Africa, was divided into three: Nairobi, Dar and Kampala (Makerere).
Abiriga: Well, that is insightful. Thanks. As for Lokodo, instead of trying to make the Makerere University Kampala girl come to you wearing that red dress, why don’t you try to change the colour of the tints on the Makerere building from blue to yellow?
Lokodo: I never said I want her to come to me.
Munyagwa: Amin’s son has been thrown out of Parliament. The House would have been much better without this Abiriga.
Karooro: @Lokodo, Makerere has moved to punish the student. How about you let them sort out for themselves?
Lokodo: Her pictures were a national disgrace?
Nsereko: I think Ethics ministry should be scrapped.
Karooro: Those who were baying for Kayihura’s blood, he has apologised.
Okupa: Kayihura apology was just hot air. You can’t achieve anything when you overstay in power. And that goes for his appointing authority too.
Franca: But they are achieving something: to stay in power by the gun.
Otafiire: Aren’t you people supposed to be passing the Budget?
Katuntu: People are happily discussing Kikoni as the K in the acronym MUK. And we are taking this country to middle income status, supposedly…
Source : Daily Monitor
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